You were expelled from Starfleet Academy after your graduate thesis on “First Contact” turned out to be a 20-page description of the night you and Wesley got fucked up on a bottle of Romulan ale and an 8-ball of coke and crossed third base.
…and Wesley’s hair didn’t move a fucking inch all night.
Wil Wheaton/The Wrath of Kahn insta-re-blog.